Conflicted

Oh hi!

It’s been a while…

If we’re friends on Facebook, no doubt you’ve seen my “political” posts. I’ve toned it down a bit and started a “page” to post stuff I think is important. Now people who actually give a hoot about what I have to say can see it while I spare everyone else.

What bothers me though is that the people who need to read what I have to say are the ones who can’t be bothered. Or they’re in such denial about the way things actually are in the world they somehow think I’m the bad guy. I actually was informed that a co-worker started referring to me as “alt-right Dana” as if I am some kind of bigot… Imagine that.

It just goes to show me, and others who have their heads out of the sand, how simple-minded our society has become. Lacking critical thought, fumbling around in echo chambers, jamming others into labeled boxes if their views cause us to question our own. Calling people racists or Nazis or bigots or “alt-right” because that is the only reason they can come up with for why some people didn’t want Hillary Clinton to be president.

So let me clear a few things up… because this has been bothering me.

I am a concerned American, a concerned mother, a concerned human being on this planet.

I see things going on in this country and in the world that sometimes eat at my soul.

I see pure evil, and I see, I realize, I’ve researched, and I know, that some of the people in power in our country, Hillary Clinton included, are the ones who fund it and enable it and encourage it. There are so many horrible things going on in the world that CNN and MSNBC and the NY Times do not and will not tell you about. And they won’t do this because they are part of it. I do not care if you believe me, I know this to be true. It is fact. It is not an “alt-right” conspiracy theory, it is fact, and I’ve known this since long before Donald Trump ran for president.

I’ve listened to what a lot of independent journalists who aren’t on the payroll at some propaganda driven corporation have to say. Some of them are conservative, some are progressive, but there is an authenticity to them that I believe and trust.

I take their word for two reasons:

First, because they’re self-funded. They’re not making millions to sit there and lie to the masses. They’re on the ground, sometimes risking their lives, to give a voice to the voiceless. They speak truth to power despite facing backlash and personal attacks.

Second, I believe them because there are so many of them, and because what they say follows a pattern that’s repeated itself. There is consistency in their reporting, in their stories. Over time my beliefs and opinions about this have only been confirmed and strengthened. Anyone who has woken up to the manipulation knows you can never go back.

I turn on CNN and I see what they are doing. I turn on Fox and I see what Bill O’Reilly does. I turn on MSNBC and am disgusted by what Rachel Maddow does for $30,000 a show. I see how they subtly conflate things and manipulate and distort. I see how they throw in blatant lies knowing they have credibility with their core audience that won’t question them. I can’t unsee it.

We are being lied to about Syria, about Russia, and about many things going on in the world. I don’t believe the news is “fake” because I love Trump and they call him out on crowd size and I can’t handle it. I believe the news is fake because IT IS FAKE, especially when it comes to geopolitics. I am not convinced of this because I read an article on RT or because I listen to Alex Jones. I believe it is fake because I have spent the last 6 years, sometimes obsessively, researching the world outside of the mainstream media’s limited narrative. There is a wealth of information out there that they filter, skew, and just plain ignore.

I have listened to whistle-blowers from the FBI, CIA, military, and other government insiders. There are tons of videos on YouTube of these people telling their stories. They do speaking engagements, they sit on panels, they do interviews with independent journalists. Their stories don’t make it to the major papers and networks for a reason – because what they have to say doesn’t fit what the people in power want you to know. There are smear pieces written about some of them, but over the last 6 years everyone I’ve listened to pretty much says the same thing. There is undeniable consistency, their stories overlap, things add up.

I listen to current and former members of Congress who have the courage to speak up against the vast majority of their peers who are greedy, corrupt, and at best complicit. I can always tell who those brave individuals are by the extent to which there is an attempt to discredit them, Tulsi Gabbard being the most recent example.

I read Wikileaks, I look at declassified intelligence memos and documents made public under FOIA. I read news from other countries, often times having to translate from other languages, and then I search for one or two other versions of the story to see how things are filtered.

Wikileaks, by the way, has a 100% accuracy record which is more than I can say for any other popular news outlet. I’ve also taken the time to read all of the information about the Julian Assange “rape” case in Sweden and the other allegations against him. It took me two hours to read all of the documentation and again, as usual, the popular narrative is nothing short of completely false.

It’s sad to me that some people who I believe respected me have dismissed me as “alt-right” or gullible because of things I’ve shared on Facebook. I’ve been accused of spreading Russian propaganda, of being an Assad apologist, and what really gets me is that the people saying this stuff have absolutely no idea what they are talking about. They have never taken an ounce of time to educate themselves about the US war propaganda machine. There is an unfathomable amount of money and coordination that goes into it. Even some of the “human rights” NGOs are in on it, funded by war profiteers with experts and reports propped up to distort the reality on the ground. Really, it is evil.

Changing the subject a little…

It just strikes me as ironic and downright foolish that there were mass protests over a “Muslim ban” while the former president along with Hillary Clinton, and Bush before that, were responsible for the destruction of those Muslim countries. I am very concerned about Trump’s decision to send troops to Syria, his seeming ignorance about Saudi Arabia’s vicious war against Yemen, and his wishy-washy statements about Ukraine (another situation we’ve been lied to about), but the fact of the matter is Americans rose up to defend Muslims who weren’t allowed to come here, but we’ve been silent while Obama armed the terrorists that literally murdered thousands of them in their own homes.

It makes me sad and angry. And there is no getting around this, it is fact. Don’t make excuses for him, it’s in CIA documents, there is tons of photographic evidence, there is an abundance of testimony from journalists and civilians. Our government destroyed Syria, Libya, and Iraq, and our citizens are more concerned with a travel ban than they are with speaking out against the murder of Muslims in their own countries. I don’t necessarily agree with the “Muslim ban”, which actually doesn’t include 85% of the world’s Muslim population, but the misplaced outrage just boggles my mind. How do people not see this?

People assume that if all of this stuff I am saying was REALLY going on it would be on the news. It can’t be real, surely they would report all of this insanity if it was really happening. Sadly, no. That is not the case. Let the fact that it is real and it is not reported demonstrate just how complicit the trusted media is. Assuming if it was credible and important to the public they would report it is naive. It’s what they want you to think.

I could keep going… I apologize if this is jumbled, but it’s what has been on my mind. I don’t like feeling like I should shut my mouth and stop telling the truth, speaking up, pointing out injustice and unreasonable logic because it’s not popular to my “liberal” friends and colleagues. I used to be a Democrat. I still hold the core beliefs of what I thought it meant to be “liberal” close – equal rights, a social safety net for the less fortunate, religion not dictating law…

But I can’t get behind the hysteria. I can’t get behind it because I know it is a calculated divide and conquer strategy. I can’t get behind it because it has become hurtful and hateful. I can’t get behind it because it is a distraction from the very roots of the country’s problems, a distraction from the world’s problems.

I think the stress of all this thinking and feeling and frustration has made me pretty depressed lately. I’ve gained weight, I’ve withdrawn, I’ve been anxious. I’ve wondered what people think of me, what they say behind my back, what they assume. Some days I even feel like I don’t belong where I am anymore because I don’t fit in. The problem is I can’t go back and un-know the things I have discovered. Like I said, once you know, once you open your mind and heart and snap out of the cognitive dissonance, you can’t go back… So I guess I just have to keep moving forward.

That is all for now… Thanks for reading!

 

 

 

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