An Open Letter To Annoying People Who Buy and Sell in Facebook Groups

bst-picI am obsessed with buying and selling kids clothing on Facebook. It’s become a hobby, and at times a headache. I am a member of a lot of groups, some I like more than others. I also started my own about 2 years ago and now it’s grown to over 7,600 people. It got so out of control last night with people breaking the rules and doing stupid stuff I had to call a time out and get things in order.

I’ve been working on this post for several days now… I started thinking about it one of the nights last week when I was driving home at 3am… I had to force myself to go to bed when I got home instead of getting on the computer to get started. I know there is a Scary Mommy post about annoying people on yard sale pages going around, it’s been sent to me at least 10 times, but I haven’t read it yet. I was working on mine and I didn’t want to read theirs before I did mine. I swear I started this before I saw that post. Just goes to show I’m not the only one thinking about how freaking aggravating it is to deal with stupid people in these groups.

This post is more about the Facebook groups where people use PayPal and ship as opposed to the local ones. I honestly prefer the PayPal and ship groups because I don’t have to leave my house or waste time actually going to meet people who don’t show up. At least if I send you an invoice for $6 and you don’t pay, I didn’t waste $3 in gas going to meet you at your convenience.

So here it is.

An Open Letter to Annoying People Who Buy and Sell in Facebook Groups.

Dear Annoying People Who Buy and Sell in Facebook Groups,


Really, how does it feel to want?



I have it, that’s why I posted a picture of it. With a price.


You want it. That’s nice. Do you want to buy it? Or do you just want me to know that you want it?

Seriously, how often do people who put “want” on something you are selling on Facebook actually follow through and buy it?

Almost as often as the people who put “interested.”


Really, that’s nice.


Are you interested in buying it and making some attempt to arrange the sale? Or do you just want me to know that you find the item interesting enough to comment on… but you’re not quite interested enough to do anything other than make my notification pop up, get me excited that maybe someone is going to buy it or at least has a valid question about it, and then do nothing?


Hold this too.

Hold this. Hold that.

Hold everything for meeeee.

Hold, while I decide if I’m actually going to buy this… I just don’t want you to sell it to anyone else who is willing to commit to paying for it because I might want it. I don’t really care if you need to sell it, I want to think about it. Mull it over. Ponder it. Check my finances. Ask my husband, call my mother, consult my accountant.


I was interested, I want it, but only kind of, so I figured I would just hold it up so that other people would scroll past it and not be able to buy it because I’m holding it.

Seriously, why is buying and selling on Facebook so freaking difficult for people?

I have items to sale G-D it. I’m having a sell, to sale my items, and I don’t want to deal with a bunch of people who seen it and just say want, interested, hold, and pass!


NOTE: I’m joking about the sale/sell thing. I didn’t think I needed to tell you that, but some people actually read that last sentence and thought I was being serious. I address the sale/sell usage thing a little later.

NOTE: And yes, they were annoying people in BST groups… Hopefully they weren’t so amused by the parts of the post they actually “got” that they come back and read this again. I blocked one nutbag who not only didn’t get that sentence and wanted to correct it, but who also didn’t get my response to her correction and went all nuts “are you calling me a ????” No, no I wasn’t. Blocked, bye!

That’s another thing that goes on in BST groups that I have tried very hard to keep out of mine… Drama. This one chick has been around and I see her ALWAYS trying to fight with people. Figures she couldn’t just laugh at something funny, she had to nitpick because she didn’t get it, and then pitch a fit because she read something the wrong way and just wanted to see something negative that wasn’t even there. Blocked, bye!

Anyway… back to the post I originally wrote…


How about this – annoying people in Facebook BST groups – SH*T or GET OFF THE POT. You ever hear that saying? It means make up your mind. Get ‘er done. Ask a question. Say SOLD and commit to buying it. Make arrangements. Leave your PayPal. Or keep freaking scrolling!

Why should I not sell to someone who is ready, willing, and (hopefully) able to pay because you MIGHT want it? This isn’t Target and I am not a red shopping cart to be filled up and pushed around for 3 hours while you decide how much you can get away with buying without overdrawing your checking account.

How much is shipping?

It’s a couple of bucks. Shipping charts are a-plenty in Facebook BST groups. Have someone tag you on one. It might be $1.93. It might be $2.25. Maybe it’s $3.47 because it’s a heavy sweater.

I can tell you this, if you’re asking what it will cost to ship 15 things, it’s NOT going to be $2, so please don’t HOLD all of that stuff thinking that miraculously the USPS rates have reverted back to 1922 prices just for you today.


Maybe I’m just an exceptionally awesome and respectful person and I should lower my expectations when it comes to other individuals, but the FIRST thing I do when I join a new Facebook group is READ THE RULES. First of all because it’s the right thing to do. Second of all, I read the rules because I don’t want to look like an IDIOT when I post something that isn’t allowed. Third, I don’t want my post to get removed. Then I’d have to like bitch at the member of the group who reminded me of the rules, pitch a public fit about how stupid the rules are, insult the power-trippy admin, and then demand to be removed… because I’m a moron and I don’t even know how to remove myself from a group.

The admin, is of course, going to get right on removing me. Especially if she’s on the mobile app that requires her to scroll through 4,000 other names to find mine to remove me. RIGHT ON THAT. TOP PRIORITY. Burn dinner, leave kid in the tub unattended, stop at a green light, whatever it takes to make sure that member who wants out of the group and asked so nicely gets removed.

Now onto the sellers that need to check themselves…

“Add .50 for each invoice to cover fees, plus PayPal fees, plus a nickel for the envelope and a dollar for my time will be added to each invoice.”


Seriously, nobody likes fees. Don’t you get annoyed when you look at your cell phone or cable bill and see this fee and that fee added? Don’t be that guy. PayPal fees are relatively minimal at 30 cents per invoice plus 2.9%. Don’t be an idiot and sell stuff for $1. Consider the fees, even venture on over to the “Fee Calculator” website to find out what your fees are going to be, and add them to the price. Round up even. It comes out to $3.79, charge $4 instead of $3.50 plus this fee, that fee, this charge, and this to cover supplies. Adding all of this extra crap to an invoice annoys and turns off buyers. Trust me, if you are adding fees to your invoice because you can’t feel like you’re eating 57 cents out of the $35 I’m sending you… yeah, I’ll pass.

GUC, has wash wear and a stain on the neckline, HTF $22 shipped.

Sorry, but I don’t care how ultra-rare that Vintage Gymboree Mermaid tee-shirt is, I am not paying $22 for ANY used piece of clothing that is faded and stained. There are 17 billion articles of clothing to choose from on these pages and eBay, your dirty item is not worth that much.

I’ve seen this one a few times lately… “Smokers in the house smoke outside.”

Ew, yuck, you smoke and you have children? Your stuff probably smells anyway. Thank you for disclosing that you smoke, a lot of people aren’t that courteous, especially smokers. I hope you don’t smoke in the car with your kids, and I hope that when you smoke outside you do so far far far away from anyone else’s children. No offense to smokers, but it’s freaking gross and you probably have no idea how much that smell permeates everything around you.

To the people who insist on posting pictures of their children in the clothing instead of just a picture of the actual clothing,… Everyone thinks their kid is the cutest in that outfit. Share your personal baby modeling pictures on your personal Facebook wall. Maybe this sounds really mean and jerky because I do see a lot of cute kids in cute outfits, but I just prefer to see a picture of the outfit laid neatly on a clean background than modeled on a child.


Nothing turns me off more when scrolling through a BST page than pictures taken on a dirty carpet. Double yuck if your nasty feet are in the shot! Come on! We have 2 kids and my carpet is not nearly as clean as I’d like it to be, but I am not going to advertise it. The clothes I sell are immaculate, I’m not going to present them on my dirty carpet. Get a solid sheet, blanket, poster board, or something clean to lay them on for pictures. It’s also not pretty to lay things out on a hideous busy looking bedspread that clashes with the outfit. Take some pride in what you are selling and stop showing everyone your spotty carpet and your stinky feet.

ISO these 15 hard to find Vintage pieces NWT or EUC only.

Single mom, just want to dress my kids nice, unemployed, can pay layaway $5 a week, prefer to buy a lot from one seller. Must ship to Canada at US prices. No more than $3 per piece.

I am really sorry but if you are unemployed and can’t afford much right now you should shop some yard sales, Goodwill, or lower your expectations just a little. Nothing wrong with trying to stretch your budget and find some nice stuff for your kids, but wanting the most hard to find higher end brand name stuff for pennies is ridiculous.

Also, stop posting ISOs you have NO intention of buying!

ISO this set from 2010 EUC.

17 responses.

“OK thanks everyone, hopefully in a few weeks I’ll get my tax refund so I can  buy some.”


You time-waster!!  I hope your check gets lost in the mail and you have to deal with the IRS to find it. Then you’ll know what it feels like to have your time wasted.

Sell vs. Sale.

When you want to sell items, you have a sale. Items you are selling are “for sale” not “for sell” – does that make sense?

You don’t have a sell. You don’t sale items.

You have a SALE. You SELL items.

Sell is the act of selling. There is no such thing as “saling” things.

I want to sell my son’s clothes.

NOT I want to sale my son’s clothes.

I am going to have a sale tonight at 10pm.

NOT I am going to have a sell tonight at 10pm.

For the love of not sounding like an absolute uneducated moron, PLEASE learn the difference.

Thank you.


The Queen of BST Etiquette AKA the Best BST Group Admin of All Time,

Dana M

PS: If anything in this post offends you, you need to do one of four things. Get a sense of humor, learn proper usage of the English language, stop smoking, or stop being an annoying person in Facebook BST groups.

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