There’s the newlyweds arriving at the airport… it’s HONEYMOON TIME!

They got married on Saturday in Malibu.

Photos: Splash News Online

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Our African Grey – Sasha – talks and picks up noises and repeats them, and of course since these birds have the learning capacity of a toddler they opt to say the most obnoxious of things they hear…

Currently, she’s saying “F**KER” like a broken record because she spent the last few months as the store pet in Philly and one of the “regular customers” thought it would be funny to try to get her to say it… and sure enough.  THANKS!!

Anyway, I don’t have her dropping the F-bomb on video… yet… but I do have her imitating Brian opening a soda, gulping it down, ahhhing when he was done… and BELCHING – TWICE!!

The voice you hear is her imitating my boyfriend…  and the clunking of the tongue is what I do constantly and she does it more and more.  I am trying to get her to say ” I love you mama” and “YOU ROCK” when we’re playing guitar hero.  Instead, she burps!!

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We are HUGE Dexter fans, so how did I not know that Michael C. Hall has been dating the girl who plays HIS SISTER on the show???  I had no idea… I was so astounded by this news when I saw it on Yahoo this morning I called my boyfriend to inform him – and he was astounded.

Just bizarre.  I mean, they’re not related in real life or anything so who cares it’s cool… but I just had no idea there was anything going on…

It’s such a good show but now it will be weird watching it knowing they are brother and sister but they sleep together in real life!!!!

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So I just called my baby daddy to talk to my daughter, and he says, “Kyla tell mommy I hung out with Lindsay Lohan’s girlfriend last night at a club called Lux in DC.”

So yeah, my ex hung out with Samantha Ronson last night…

I said well Kyla tell daddy that Lindsay and Sam broke up!

And so he says he asked Samantha straight up to her face if they broke up and she said “no.”

I’m not saying Sam didn’t lie to him, but that’s what she said.

And here she is in DC last night, randomly signing a baseball?

:)

Photos: Splash News Online

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Since her music and acting career didn’t take off the way she and her mother wanted it to, Ali Lohan has taken a job working as Lindsay’s assistant’s dog walker.

No really, that’s Lilo’s assistant’s dog.

Where are the pictures of her scooping the poop???

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Jessica Alba took Honor Marie to the park… How come these celebrities don’t set up play dates??

Photos: Splash News Online

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Here are a bunch of pictures.  It has taken me all afternoon to do this, I keep getting distracted by Facebook.  Good thing I’m my own boss!!

Dakota Fanning looks MUCH BETTER than she did in that blue atrocity the other day.  Some people got all pissed that I was picking on her, but this is exactly what I was talking about… something that flatters her.  I think she’s a little young for those heels though.  She is FOURTEEN.

Photos: Splash News Online

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Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise took Katie’s Cabbage Patch Kid out for a walk!

Yes, that’s Katie’s CPK – I know because she’s from the 80′s… The #4 headmold – missing a pacifier!  As you may or may not know, I have a massive doll collection and would LOVE to provide Suri Cruise’s inherited from mommy ‘kid with a paci!!!

How can I send it to her??  Does anyone out there know Katie or Tom or one of their people???  Anyone???

SERIOUSLY – email me – [email protected]

And don’t forget to be my  Facebook Friend

And while you’re there be my Facebook Fan too!

Photos: Splash News Online

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