OK, Mariah Carey doesn’t actually EAT Nick Cannon, and I am not trying to be crass or gross in any sexual way, but basically Mariah Carey is enormous, big enough to devour Nick Cannon… do you get what I’m saying?

They’ve been denying their “romance” but Mariah apparently told Lady Victoria that she would only perform at her Cannes Party next month if Nick could go with her…

In case you’re wondering, Lady Victoria is a “British Socialite”… I wish I could be a socialite.  I’d like to major in socialiteonomy when I go to college.

Really, I can’t wait to see picture of them together as a couple.  Maybe I am not thinking of him in proportion because I really don’t pay much attention to him, but won’t they look like the next J-Lo and Marc Anthony?